He has returned!!!

As you people may have noticed, I haven't updated in about a week and a half. My apologies. My google adsense account was closed and I actually was busy for once. Never fear though, I have returned.

Today's show for you to reference?

Rugrats.




That is one ill rap I must say.

Here's what you need to know about the Rugrats.
Chuckie was afraid of everything. The one thing he wasn't initially afraid was this clown:

That would be Boppo, who could only say, "Hi! I'm Boppo!"

Boppo was invented by Tommy's dad, Stu. Chuckie loved it so much that Tommy let him have it. But then, in the middle of the night, Chuckie saw the silhouette of Boppo and that made Mr. Finster need a new diaper. But could he give it back? HELL NO!! According to Phil and Lil he'd be a GiverBacker then and that would ruin his friendship with Tommy. Tommy wanted Boppo back though, but then he would be a TAKERBACKER!!!!!!!! Whatever were they to do? Well, five minutes later when the episode needed to wrap up, Tommy was the proud owner of Boppo.

There also was one episode when the babies actually didn't hate Angelica and her weird obsession with Cynthia dolls.

In this episode the rats think the world has ended and they only survived because they built a fort out of a picnic table. They must have gotten that advice from the Russians during the Cold War. Well, Angelica was turned into stone (It was actually a statue her Dad, Drew, built for her birthday) and the babies accidentally destroyed it. Tommy cried, Phil and Lil made-out, and Chuckie wondered what life was like on the planet on his shirt.

Always remember, a baby's gotta do, what a baby's gotta do.

R. Kelly v. Nickelodeon

Is the whole R. Kelly looking at underage kids joke old? Yes. Could I think of another person to look at kiddie porn? No.

Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I stand before you today not to preach to you that looking at kiddie porn is tolerable. I am here to tell you that perhaps this wasn't his fault that he was so attracted to the younger demographic. You, yourself may have this hidden enema inside you, but R. Kelly just couldn't control it anymore after watching Thanksgiving marathons of nonstop Nicktoons.

Judge, I would like to call upon this wallaby to take the stand.

 

Jury, would please take a look at this wild untamed and dastardly animal from the Austrailian Outback. You know what else says they are from Austrailia? This place. Bafoolery I say! 

Now to my point in case. Let's take a look at this character. Does anybody else see the fact that between his shirt and shoes, there is nothing in between? That's right, Rocko, a kids television character, always has his pants on the ground. Lookin like a fool, Rocko just smiles at everybody. I would be smiling too if I never had to wear pants. 

Let's not let his sidekick, Heffer, off the hook though. Most of the time he's just wearing pants with suspenders to cover his nipples, but he too, has shown more skin than some people can handle.

Just look!

 

What is that supposed to teach us? That beastiality is perfectly acceptable?

Rocko and Heffer, you may now leave the stand, I have no further questions.

I now call to the stand, Klasky and Csupo. Jury, you may know them better as the perverts behind the toddler show called Rugrats.

This show seemed wholesome at first, four babies playing around and having a good time. Then things went too far. Almost every other episode Angelica was bending over and showing us her underwear. Too far yet jury? It gets worse. They named the person who knew the most about babies Dr. Lipschitz. Separate his name by the syllables and that you might as well call him Dr. Mouthpoop.

Is feces in the mouth too disgusting for you jury? No? 

Then I present to you the case of Rugrats episode number 54, "Naked Tommy"

Now we have naked babies. Great. Not only does Tommy go buck, but so does Chuckie "The Ginger" Finster.
Jury, I know you're speechless. Go home and think about this tonight. Clicking on some ads on this page does help your thought process. The court will reconvene when we figure out why Boppo was always saying, "Hi, I'm Boppo."

Old Show for you to reference #4: Nick in the Afternoon

Yes, the almighty Popsicle stick has made his online blog debut.
In case you don't remember, that yellow nosed character is known as Stick Stickly; the host of Nick in the Afternoon. NITA was only in the summer when kids didn't have school, so all those remedial kids who were stuck in summer school never got to experience this phenomenon.
Mr. Stickly was able to use his wooden self to his advantage of "choosing" the next cartoon. Double S would spin himself to randomly choose the next cartoon to be aired and oh boy did it make him dizzy. Stick's face changed from what it normally is, go ahead i'll wait while you look at the image above to remember again, to a completed circle mouth and his eyes at the top of his plastic encasing.
But we got back at ol' Stickaroo everyday. The DUNCE CAP was our revenge of taking advantage of something with no brain. Everyday we would ask him the simplest of corny jokes. Would stick get it right? NUH UH, NO WAY, NOT A CHANCE IN HELL, NADDA. S to the S wore the DUNCE CAP. 
Sticky always got me right where it hurts though. He would roll the public service announcement with a kid swimming in a pool and then the same narrator who promoted all my cartoons would tell me to turn of the tv and go outside. WHAT THE HELL NICK? Yes, I called the narrator Nick, pretty original. These were conflicting arguments by one person. On one hand I was supposed to make sure Tommy and Chuckie were going to be alright if Reptar went apeshit on them, but how could I if I was selfishly enjoying myself at the pool?
And this is how I ended up here folks. Because of Nick the narrator's confusing arguments and Stick-O choosing my next cartoon to watch.