tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2278159340701028112024-03-13T23:47:30.777-07:00The Unemployed GradWhere I'm wondering what Goldberg from the Mighty Ducks is up to.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-72358926903554416152010-09-22T13:42:00.000-07:002011-02-20T16:00:29.140-08:00He has returned!!!As you people may have noticed, I haven't updated in about a week and a half. My apologies. My google adsense account was closed and I actually was busy for once. Never fear though, I have returned.<br />
<br />
Today's show for you to reference?<br />
<br />
Rugrats.<br />
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<br />
<object height="300" width="300"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/gARh28l4gLE?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/gARh28l4gLE?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="300" height="300"></embed></object><br />
<br />
That is one ill rap I must say.<br />
<br />
Here's what you need to know about the Rugrats.<br />
Chuckie was afraid of everything. The one thing he wasn't initially afraid was this clown:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://superyo.nuxit.net/Razmoket/inventions/jouets/clown-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="146" src="http://superyo.nuxit.net/Razmoket/inventions/jouets/clown-2.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">That would be Boppo, who could only say, "Hi! I'm Boppo!"</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Boppo was invented by Tommy's dad, Stu. Chuckie loved it so much that Tommy let him have it. But then, in the middle of the night, Chuckie saw the silhouette of Boppo and that made Mr. Finster need a new diaper. But could he give it back? HELL NO!! According to Phil and Lil he'd be a GiverBacker then and that would ruin his friendship with Tommy. Tommy wanted Boppo back though, but then he would be a TAKERBACKER!!!!!!!! Whatever were they to do? Well, five minutes later when the episode needed to wrap up, Tommy was the proud owner of Boppo.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">There also was one episode when the babies actually didn't hate Angelica and her weird obsession with Cynthia dolls.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">In this episode the rats think the world has ended and they only survived because they built a fort out of a picnic table. They must have gotten that advice from the Russians during the Cold War. Well, Angelica was turned into stone (It was actually a statue her Dad, Drew, built for her birthday) and the babies accidentally destroyed it. Tommy cried, Phil and Lil made-out, and Chuckie wondered what life was like on the planet on his shirt.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Always remember, a baby's gotta do, what a baby's gotta do.</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-4591382912590549692010-09-13T17:24:00.000-07:002010-09-13T17:25:36.874-07:00100 applications milestone reached!Ladies and gentlemen, I have crossed a plateau. 100 applications has been breached and here are the top seven things I've experienced from it.<br />
<div><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>7. No matter what, there is always something to be fixed on the resume. Just today, I noticed my format was off. Awesome. I had computer skills as a header, but below the actual skills. It wasn't always like that but when I tinkered with one part, it must have thrown off another.</div><div><br />
</div><div>6. My record for quickest rejection? I set it today, twice. At first, it was set at a four hour response back saying the position had already been filled. Then, this happened.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TI69ru-P83I/AAAAAAAAAD8/MEYkJYCZIdI/s1600/rejection.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="118" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TI69ru-P83I/AAAAAAAAAD8/MEYkJYCZIdI/s320/rejection.PNG" width="320" /></a></div><div><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's look at the time mine was sent and her reply. 24 minutes. </div><div><br />
</div><div>5. When the amount of applications stacks up so high, you tend to forget where you've applied. I've had to go through numerous applications only to learn at the very end of the process, they already had it on file.</div><div><br />
</div><div>4. This blog hasn't helped me get a job yet. No surprise there.</div><div><br />
</div><div>3. I have created an alternate email account just for all the SPAM I get now. </div><div><br />
</div><div>2. How many user names and accounts have I created? That's more than 30 by now. These companies think its a great idea for you to create an account to apply to them. Don't they realize this is most likely a one time thing for me to apply?</div><div><br />
</div><div>1. My number one experience? The amount of disc golf I've gotten to play is outrageous. </div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-58917214704760593702010-09-11T11:47:00.000-07:002010-09-20T13:38:13.945-07:00Weird choices of a hook-up...There are certain people that receive notoriety that cannot be explained. When people gain this popularity, the quality of their looks can go down but people would still want to hook up with them. I call it SJPS, or in longhand: Sarah Jessica Parker Syndrome.<br />
Today I want to share with you some of those people that aren't really good looking but still can get a lot of smoosh smoosh.<br />
<br />
Example number one:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvLGe1FAQI/AAAAAAAAADc/nPXeuX1gna8/s1600/flo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="120" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvLGe1FAQI/AAAAAAAAADc/nPXeuX1gna8/s200/flo.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Flo. The Progressive lady. For some reason, I would just to say I did. If she wasn't on those commercials, no way. She can save me so much money though even if its not with Progressive and she works in car insurance heaven, literally. Flo is pasty and already developed the rear made for <a href="http://www.mediabistro.com/fishbowlDC/original/mom_jeans.jpg">these</a>. If she took off those mom pants though, I wouldn't pass it up.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Example numero dos:</div><br />
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvMVSdJtyI/AAAAAAAAADk/Yebqkd5f6hs/s1600/brody2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="164" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvMVSdJtyI/AAAAAAAAADk/Yebqkd5f6hs/s200/brody2.jpg" width="200" /></a><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Adrien Brody. I can't really even name a movie he's in. I tend to steer away from flicks where noses take up half the screen. If anyone has ever seen the movie Perfume, you're left wondering how Mr. Brody wasn't cast for the man with the golden honker for scent. Brody is wanted by ladies somehow and its a huzzah for all men that have a facial feature make a film look like its in 3D when its only 2D.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Example number three:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvNkDKzGwI/AAAAAAAAADs/9T8WS5NLYwg/s1600/kate-gosselin-beach-bikini1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIvNkDKzGwI/AAAAAAAAADs/9T8WS5NLYwg/s200/kate-gosselin-beach-bikini1.jpg" width="169" /></a><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Why wouldn't you want to try this one out? If she's popped out eight kids, seemed possessed and had low enough self-esteem to marry a balding Asian in his twenties at the time, wouldn't you? You really can't pass up Kate. Take away her celeb status and there's nothing to her. That aura mixed with her bitchy attitude makes it interesting to see how the results could be between four bedposts. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Yes, this post was completely off-topic of the norm, but this had been stewing for a long time and I want some more traffic for the page.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
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</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-50996352427675051092010-09-09T11:13:00.000-07:002010-09-09T11:16:57.233-07:00Old Show for you to reference #6, Part Two: All That!Last time we left off with the skits of Kenan. You can view that <a href="http://unemployeddegree.blogspot.com/2010/09/old-show-for-you-to-reference-6-part.html">here</a>.<br />
Today we delve into his best friend, Kel.<br />
<br />
What I really have yet to understand about this BP oil spill is why this man has not been called yet.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIkfqQ8AorI/AAAAAAAAADM/O2TIx_BvBuk/s1600/rep.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIkfqQ8AorI/AAAAAAAAADM/O2TIx_BvBuk/s200/rep.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">That's right, because he's Repair Man Man Man Man.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Since he was so awesome, he not only gets a picture on the post, but a video as well.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><object height="300" width="300"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/o06rm4PzYMw?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/o06rm4PzYMw?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="300" height="300"></embed></object></div><br />
So not only can RMMMM fix mechanical things, he can fix relationships as well!<br />
You know what the shame is though? RMMMM could fix everything that wasn't himself. So when he turned into this, there was just no hope.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIkg4ZSDgHI/AAAAAAAAADU/6xC2BMNrGRk/s1600/pizzaface.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="136" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIkg4ZSDgHI/AAAAAAAAADU/6xC2BMNrGRk/s200/pizzaface.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Can't remember what skit pizza face was from? Look at Ross Perot on the left and see if that jogs the mind.<br />
Do you need a good burger? Do you need a place that is like a home that has a good burger?<br />
Look no further than Good Burger and your favorite cashier Ed.<br />
"Hi! Welcome to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger, can I take your order?"<br />
Here's how awesome Good Burger was:<br />
They made a movie about it.<br />
They got Sinbad to play a part in the movie known as Mr. Wheat. Then Sinbad checked into a mental institution with Rob Thomas a decade later, but that's a different show.<br />
Ed just sang a song containing the word "dude" and it was up for a Grammy.<br />
Ed also had his hands in the commercial of Good Burger and all the ladies dug it.<br />
<br />
I know, I now have to leave you with a Good Burger video. That's the only proper way to send this one off. Come back next time where we hook up with, I mean, discuss Amanda Bynes on the show.<br />
<object height="300" width="300"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/eyL2qjhmlrY?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/eyL2qjhmlrY?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="300" height="300"></embed></object>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-48495798101382409772010-09-08T14:27:00.000-07:002010-09-08T14:27:29.038-07:00Test your skills and the JUNPID SAGA!So now that I've given you some education on some old shows, I found a test for you to take.<br />
See if you can beat my score.<br />
I got 51 right.<br />
<a href="http://www.sporcle.com/games/beanhead4529/nickelodeon_triviaz">http://www.sporcle.com/games/beanhead4529/nickelodeon_triviaz</a><br />
<br />
The Kel update should be up tomorrow. That list should keep everybody busy.<br />
<br />
As for the JUNPID saga. It has come to a pass, sort of.<br />
I am now employed at a restaurant. I start on Friday. I haven't decided yet if I will just start another blog about serving random customers or to combine it with this one. Let me know what you think.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-13441562827672250892010-09-06T13:37:00.000-07:002010-09-06T13:37:23.117-07:00Who said wrestling was fake?We've got footage of a real live birth during a WWF pay per view!<br />
<object height="320" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8dohb-HMb2Q?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/8dohb-HMb2Q?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="320" height="320"></embed></object>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-53614400285886468542010-09-03T15:52:00.000-07:002010-09-03T15:55:51.576-07:00Old Show for you to reference #6, Part One: All That!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIF3Rv7k66I/AAAAAAAAAC8/1w0oKGY2DoQ/s1600/shes_all_that.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIF3Rv7k66I/AAAAAAAAAC8/1w0oKGY2DoQ/s200/shes_all_that.jpg" width="134" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Don't worry, we're not here to talk about that movie.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">We're here to talk about this:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIF34okf-6I/AAAAAAAAADE/BVf7M-yHt5M/s1600/allthat.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TIF34okf-6I/AAAAAAAAADE/BVf7M-yHt5M/s320/allthat.gif" /></a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">First of all, does anybody ever really remember the names of the adult characters of the show? I know I delve into the specifics for you to reference, but nobody ever remembers them. The one in the back does look like Tony Siragusa though.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Here's some of your headlining cast members: Kenan, Kel, Katrina, Lori Beth, Amanda, and Josh.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">We're going to start off with Kenan focused skits.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">There was Bradley, the Big Ol Baby.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><object height="300" width="300"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/peIlDvZFYIA?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/peIlDvZFYIA?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="300" height="300"></embed></object></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">All he ever did was cry but for some reason it was hilarious. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Kenan also had his alter ego, Pierre Es Cargo. For those of you who don't remember he was in a yellow rain suit while in a bath tub with his rubber ducky. That wasn't enough though, he taught us French while entertaining us! What a guy!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Then there was Saggin Baggin Berry. He was a high school student who had huge pants that he could put anything in. How did he hold his pants up? I always assumed cable wire disguised in suspenders. If you ever needed anything though, just ask Berry to reach deep into his pants. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Before we ever found out who loved orange soda, we knew who loved chocolate on the skit "Cooking with Randy and Mandy" It quickly became just Randy since Mandy left the show. Chocolate waffle maker, chocolate remote, chocolate belt.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Ms. Pidlin was also a great one. Ms. Pidlin loved peas and wanted to make sure all the students ate their peas, but nobody ever wanted them! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Then there was everybody's favorite lactose intolerant person, Superdude! A welcoming hero who could bend prison bars, fly, and beat up bad guys. His arch nemesis? Milk Man!! The agony! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">So there you have it. Come back in two days for Part Two of this All That series: Kel.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-22171985052209234162010-09-01T09:44:00.000-07:002010-09-01T09:44:02.478-07:00The J.U.N.P.I.D. saga continuesHere is the weekly update or so of the JUNPID saga.<br />
I'm still unemployed.<br />
I have started to consider applying for sales jobs.<br />
I have applied to four positions in the past week I am more than qualified for in the radio and newspaper industry. Nadda so far.<br />
At least I'm not broke.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-48709644690576833292010-08-31T15:42:00.000-07:002010-08-31T15:42:41.331-07:00Lessons in life: Look both ways before crossing the street.It is now time for what I like to call Lessons In Life. Today we go over the perils of looking both ways before crossing the street, especially if you're going to cross the street while dancing. Enjoy.<br />
<object height="320" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/AeoOR_NWHyo?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/AeoOR_NWHyo?fs=1&hl=en_US&rel=0&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="320" height="320"></embed></object><br />
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The guy turned out to be OK. But maybe he should be doing the Skeeter or something instead of the Dougie.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-84202428867154844992010-08-27T13:10:00.000-07:002010-08-27T13:32:29.637-07:00R. Kelly v. NickelodeonIs the whole R. Kelly looking at underage kids joke old? Yes. Could I think of another person to look at kiddie porn? No.<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I stand before you today not to preach to you that looking at kiddie porn is tolerable. I am here to tell you that perhaps this wasn't his fault that he was so attracted to the younger demographic. You, yourself may have this hidden enema inside you, but R. Kelly just couldn't control it anymore after watching Thanksgiving marathons of nonstop Nicktoons.<br />
<br />
Judge, I would like to call upon this wallaby to take the stand.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THgXVSUk0KI/AAAAAAAAAB8/3-sqpKwvPVU/s200/rockos_modern_life-show.jpg" width="200" /> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Jury, would please take a look at this wild untamed and dastardly animal from the Austrailian Outback. You know what else says they are from Austrailia? <a href="http://www.outback.com/">This place.</a> Bafoolery I say! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Now to my point in case. Let's take a look at this character. Does anybody else see the fact that between his shirt and shoes, there is nothing in between? That's right, Rocko, a kids television character, always has his <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMwhl4IrPNc">pants on the ground.</a> Lookin like a fool, Rocko just smiles at everybody. I would be smiling too if I never had to wear pants. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Let's not let his sidekick, Heffer, off the hook though. Most of the time he's just wearing pants with suspenders to cover his nipples, but he too, has shown more skin than some people can handle.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Just look!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><img border="0" height="148" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THgY-8EPv0I/AAAAAAAAACE/CNfDlZRhMD0/s200/hefferinthong.jpg" width="200" /> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">What is that supposed to teach us? That beastiality is perfectly acceptable?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Rocko and Heffer, you may now leave the stand, I have no further questions.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I now call to the stand, Klasky and Csupo. Jury, you may know them better as the perverts behind the toddler show called Rugrats.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This show seemed wholesome at first, four babies playing around and having a good time. Then things went too far. Almost every other episode Angelica was bending over and showing us her underwear. Too far yet jury? It gets worse. They named the person who knew the most about babies <a href="http://www.rugratonline.com/lipshitz.gif">Dr. Lipschitz</a>. Separate his name by the syllables and that you might as well call him Dr. Mouthpoop.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Is feces in the mouth too disgusting for you jury? No? </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Then I present to you the case of Rugrats episode number 54, "Naked Tommy"</div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THgavBB_syI/AAAAAAAAACM/O3AK8OFyet4/s1600/A1D3D569B548F8D14EAB6A.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THgavBB_syI/AAAAAAAAACM/O3AK8OFyet4/s320/A1D3D569B548F8D14EAB6A.jpg" /></a><br />
Now we have naked babies. Great. Not only does Tommy go buck, but so does Chuckie "The Ginger" Finster.<br />
Jury, I know you're speechless. Go home and think about this tonight. Clicking on some ads on this page does help your thought process. The court will reconvene when we figure out why Boppo was always saying, "Hi, I'm Boppo."Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-33235083961093878752010-08-25T16:25:00.000-07:002010-08-25T16:25:35.025-07:00Old Show for you to reference #5: Supermarket Sweep!"This is a vegetable that is also in the old saying, 'Mind your ____ and Q's'. Yellow team, you buzzed in first"<br />
"English!"<br />
<br />
English in the 1990's was a vegetable. It was such a popular vegetable that everybody that lived in the United States spoke it every day.<br />
The iconic gameshow of 90's galore had a host to die for, as a father.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THWiuKLbIYI/AAAAAAAAABs/oyAfiHI9Cck/s1600/davidruprecht.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THWiuKLbIYI/AAAAAAAAABs/oyAfiHI9Cck/s320/davidruprecht.jpg" /></a></div>David Ruprecht was the ultimate looking father. He's still got some of his looks, he knows a lot about buying groceries, and he was always cracking jokes that would make anyone under nine laugh. Hand the guy a can of Busch to drink while he hosted and its game over for Father of the Year award.<br />
Rupy asked his contestants food related questions and if you go it right, you had to let your partner, who was in the same awesome cotton sweater try and answer the question. Then it was on to practically hangman.<br />
But it all built up to climax of the show, the Supermarket Sweep! Finally, twenty minutes of answering Neanderthal questions to accumulate more time to shop was going to pay off.<br />
The Blue team bolted towards the deli and grabbed the biggest ham they could possibly lift. Then the dairy aisle was close enough for the cheese wheel. <b>BIG BUCKS BIG BUCKS NO WHAMMY STOP! </b>Wrong game but that's what I always thought would be cool if a Whammy popped up out of the freezer aisle and took away some of their items. Anyways, whoever racked up the biggest bill won the game,<br />
If you ever have this competition between you and some soccer mom's at a local grocery store, take these steps towards beating them:<br />
1. Realize they need this more than you do, they actually want to keep the groceries.<br />
2. Don't care about step number one.<br />
3. Grab a big ol' ham.<br />
4. Grab cheese.<br />
5. Stuff your cart with diapers and baby food.<br />
6. Medicines can fit anywhere, stuff em.<br />
<br />
And number seven is the big secret to dominating Supermarket Sweep that still hasn't caught on.<br />
7. Use the bottom rack! Nobody ever uses it.<br />
<br />
So there you go. Next time you challenge some soccer mom's or Mr. Ruprecht and his colorful sweaters are put back in the game show market, you have an advantage. Remember though, always be prepared for<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THWl6oSS-0I/AAAAAAAAAB0/WHv_70AY1FY/s1600/whammy_3081.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THWl6oSS-0I/AAAAAAAAAB0/WHv_70AY1FY/s320/whammy_3081.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THWl6oSS-0I/AAAAAAAAAB0/WHv_70AY1FY/s1600/whammy_3081.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a> in any aisle, at any time.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Check back within two days as I will bring up the biggest lawsuit since Plessy v. Ferguson,</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> R. Kelly v. Nickelodeon.</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-29201213082857860102010-08-23T20:31:00.000-07:002010-08-25T16:25:51.111-07:00Old Show for you to reference #4: Nick in the Afternoon<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THM5DmJ_LXI/AAAAAAAAABk/E_2WzHpVQQU/s1600/stick.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/THM5DmJ_LXI/AAAAAAAAABk/E_2WzHpVQQU/s320/stick.jpg" /></a></div>Yes, the almighty Popsicle stick has made his online blog debut.<br />
In case you don't remember, that yellow nosed character is known as Stick Stickly; the host of Nick in the Afternoon. NITA was only in the summer when kids didn't have school, so all those remedial kids who were stuck in summer school never got to experience this phenomenon.<br />
Mr. Stickly was able to use his wooden self to his advantage of "choosing" the next cartoon. Double S would spin himself to randomly choose the next cartoon to be aired and oh boy did it make him dizzy. Stick's face changed from what it normally is, go ahead i'll wait while you look at the image above to remember again, to a completed circle mouth and his eyes at the top of his plastic encasing.<br />
But we got back at ol' Stickaroo everyday. The <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">DUNCE CAP</span></b> was our revenge of taking advantage of something with no brain. Everyday we would ask him the simplest of corny jokes. Would stick get it right? NUH UH, NO WAY, NOT A CHANCE IN HELL, NADDA.<i> S to the S</i> wore the <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">DUNCE CAP.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;">Sticky always got me right where it hurts though. He would roll the public service announcement with a kid swimming</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;">in a pool and then the same narrator who promoted all my cartoons would tell me to turn of the tv and go outside. WHAT THE HELL NICK? Yes, I called the narrator Nick, pretty original. These were conflicting arguments by one person. On one hand I was supposed to make sure Tommy and Chuckie were going to be alright if Reptar went apeshit on them, but how could I if I was selfishly enjoying myself at the pool?</span></b><br />
And this is how I ended up here folks. Because of Nick the narrator's confusing arguments and Stick-O choosing my next cartoon to watch.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-87427443068600713402010-08-20T13:49:00.000-07:002010-08-20T13:49:24.937-07:00JUNPID saga continues!Today's is short and sweet because that's how it happened to me today. For those of you who forgot what JUNPID was, it stands for Jobless, Unemployed, Not Working, Poor, & In Debt.<br />
<br />
Today I applied to JBuck's.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TG7o0kyNIwI/AAAAAAAAABU/ygWu7r6vn1M/s1600/buckhumongous.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="143" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TG7o0kyNIwI/AAAAAAAAABU/ygWu7r6vn1M/s200/buckhumongous.png" width="200" /></a></div><br />
This restaurant was seeking some servers. I printed out the application, filled it out, and drove there to turn it in. The following conversation with hostess ensued:<br />
<br />
Me: "Hello there!"<br />
Hostess: "<i>eh"</i><br />
Me: "How are you doing today?"<br />
Hostess: "<i>eh"</i><br />
Me: "I came to turn in my application for the open serving postions.<br />
Hostess: "<i>Oh."</i><br />
After she said that powerful two letter word, she took my application and waved goodbye.<br />
I didn't feel like dealing with someone who had the vernacular of <a href="http://youlookhungry.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/encino-man1.jpg">Encino Man</a> so I didn't bother to ask if I could speak to a manager. I'll just call Monday.<br />
And how about this for a mugshot?<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TG7qJRvbu0I/AAAAAAAAABc/VObJG4iwrWk/s1600/4c6e9bfad45cb.image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TG7qJRvbu0I/AAAAAAAAABc/VObJG4iwrWk/s200/4c6e9bfad45cb.image.jpg" width="160" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This is Cardinals play-by-play announcer Dan McLaughlin hammered. What a photo</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-69924075557669653652010-08-18T15:56:00.000-07:002010-08-18T20:41:11.334-07:00Old Show for you to reference #3: Laverne and Shirley<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGxhRtEeBsI/AAAAAAAAABM/MMVWx1aHyaY/s1600/0_22_laverne_and_shirley.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="248" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGxhRtEeBsI/AAAAAAAAABM/MMVWx1aHyaY/s320/0_22_laverne_and_shirley.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and Gentlemen, its time to make our dreams come true. You make any rules, we're gonna break em.<br />
<br />
Sorry, got caught up in the moment there.<br />
Laverne and Shirley was a 1980's sitcom with two hot tuscaderoes (<a href="http://megomuseum.com/megolibrary/articles/images/pinky.jpg">Happy Days reference there</a>) should have been named Lust and Sexy.<br />
<br />
These two girls worked at Shotz beer manufacturing plant, something we can only aspire to be. They were even so cool in the opening credits the put their gloves on a couple of bottles and waved to them. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRmKzxhMzwo">52 second of the video</a>.<br />
<br />
Of course two femme fatales could not carry the show by themselves.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGxjQ4WR0MI/AAAAAAAAABQ/iYRPxOUd3no/s1600/lonewolf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGxjQ4WR0MI/AAAAAAAAABQ/iYRPxOUd3no/s200/lonewolf.jpg" width="200" /></a></div> They had the Lone Wolves to help them out. The dynamo duo of Lenny and Squiggy provided for pipsqueak 101 entertainment. Imagine the Fonz (HD reference number 2) split himself into two people. Without the Fonz being whole, his cheesy lines couldn't work on the ladies. Such is the case of Lenny and Squiggy.<br />
<br />
L&S jumped the shark in all of its glory as Laverne left the show but not without Squiggy giving her a Lone Wolf jacket of her own.<br />
When somebody asks you about Laverne and Shirley say these three things and nobody will question you about your knowledge of the show:<br />
They were the 80's version of Lucy and Ethel.<br />
They wore poodle skirts all the time.<br />
They were always at the bowling alley drinking beer but you never saw them actually bowl. And Laverne could put away the beer better than Shirley.<br />
<br />
I threw in the fourth in case you ever make it onto <a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/0c/BtG-Logo.jpg">this show</a> and the Laverne and Shirley Geek is your opponent.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-36578413628480891492010-08-16T11:06:00.000-07:002010-08-16T16:39:10.178-07:00Classic show to reference: Olmec and the gang.If you don't know what show I'm talking about already, then you, my friend, need a crash course.<br />
The classic game show Legends of the Hidden Temple hosted by<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ipeSnHEXtn0/SIa4XnKdsPI/AAAAAAAAAPc/2r6DXB5dkhA/s400/Kirk+Fogg.JPG"> Kirk Fogg</a>, who was a childhood version of Jeff Probst, put up six teams that comprised of a color scheme and an animal.<br />
Some of the time, the team name made sense. There are purple parrots. Blue barracudas are possible. Orange iguanas are awesome looking.<br />
<br />
The other three remaining teams were likely one of the writers on an acid trip.<br />
Silver snakes? Alliteration is cute, but the correct term would be albino.<br />
A red jaguar?<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGl3FP01JjI/AAAAAAAAAA8/L248vcXmZHg/s1600/jaguar-xkr-red-3_16.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGl3FP01JjI/AAAAAAAAAA8/L248vcXmZHg/s200/jaguar-xkr-red-3_16.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Doesn't look like an animal to me.<br />
<br />
And my favorite team name that didn't make sense: green monkeys. No alliteration even like the other two that don't make sense. Just a random color with an animal. Brown wasn't even used yet, which would have worked. Guess that would've been racist.<br />
<br />
So the game starts with the six teams crossing a moat. The purple parrots fell into the moat at least four times a race. Fogg always said to never count them out though.<br />
<br />
After the treacherous moat was the steps of knowledge. Pee break of the show. Olmec, which by the way I haven't even thrown an image up of yet, would tell a story of some ancient doofus who lost something. Here's a look at our favorite stoney.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGl5Cv1rsMI/AAAAAAAAABE/KpZbZ1U-j5Q/s1600/olmec.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGl5Cv1rsMI/AAAAAAAAABE/KpZbZ1U-j5Q/s320/olmec.jpg" /></a></div>After two teams walked down three stairs it was time for a heads up duel. This would determine the pendants of life and who would go on to the temple.Olmec would throw in a story to tie in each game but the teams had to do these three things: stay on top of log that functioned like a mechanical bull, drop something into a basket in a bizarre way, and glide down a temple version of slip n slide.<br />
<br />
Tie one game and you get a half pendant, win you get a whole, A half pendant was about as useful as Kirk Fogg trying to makes these games sound interesting.<br />
<br />
<b>TEMPLE TIME</b>!<br />
<br />
Here's how this went down: jump into ball pit. Then go into Madusa's lair and put some snakes into her hair. Go into a neon lit room and make some bizarre formations against a wall. Travel into swamp where you put your hands in the mouth of a tree and oh no! A TEMPLE GUARD HID IN THE TREE AND HUGGED YOU!!!!!!!!! The girl gives up the pendant, (Why did the girl always go first? They always got caught because they just walked through the damn thing. The boy was left with 20 seconds every time and no pendant.) and on to the Shrine of the Silver Monkey. Three pieces these geniuses couldn't put together. This monkey was so hard to put together that even <a href="http://i.ytimg.com/vi/G4Fgdv0cEBc/0.jpg">Superdude</a> would have trouble with.<br />
<br />
And if you won, you got to <a href="http://www.manhattanstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Roseland-Ranch-2.jpg">go here!</a><br />
<br />
Want to watch some teams fail miserably?<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBdLoYmUfTE&feature=related">Here</a><br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=shLk32wjrPI&feature=related">and here</a><br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCMiKgW8K7Q&feature=related">and one more time</a>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-8562613843008824112010-08-15T16:30:00.000-07:002010-09-20T13:39:16.071-07:00JUNPID saga: the part time fillerSince I can't find a job in dying industry I have decided to start the search for a part-time job.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGh56_0wvGI/AAAAAAAAAA0/mnjtxTXN_Kc/s1600/waiter.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGh56_0wvGI/AAAAAAAAAA0/mnjtxTXN_Kc/s200/waiter.gif" width="121" /></a></div><br />
Here are the current options:<br />
<br />
<b>Go back to serving. </b>There are many places that are hiring. There are plenty of cracked out people in this industry, great for my fellow readers. <br />
<br />
<b>Substitute teaching</b>. I make my own hours and get to sit at a desk and hand out an assignment. This costs about a $100 before with all the fingerprints and background tests. I would get to blog about the kids, which hopefully are all <a href="http://images.tvrage.com/shows/4/3718.jpg">like this.</a> Two points to anybody who can tell me the name of this show.<br />
<br />
<b>Miscellaneous labor</b>.<b> </b>This category qualifies under anything I find on craig's list under the men seeking men section. I would turn down <a href="http://ambientmuse.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/lord_voldemort1.jpg">this guy</a> though. Just not my thing. I need a nose in the relationship.<br />
<br />
<b>Playing poker, blogging, and taking online surveys. </b>This is what I'm currently doing. Online surveys are tricky and difficult to make something off of. They do help kill time though when my <a href="http://www.themovieblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/dragonball.jpg">Dragonball</a> episode isn't fully loaded yet. <br />
<br />
<b>Actually get a job I want</b>. Let's hope this is the option that actually happens. Since the last JUNPID saga entry I've applied to eight more places. One's got to happen sooner or later.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-28195841059969589582010-08-12T10:04:00.000-07:002010-08-12T18:23:04.064-07:00The J.U.N.P.I.D. saga<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGQpPaDP7TI/AAAAAAAAAAs/FCAq_5mKNWE/s1600/bum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGQpPaDP7TI/AAAAAAAAAAs/FCAq_5mKNWE/s320/bum.jpg" /></a></div>Haven't you heard of that acronym before? You haven't? Well you're behind in the times then of being able to read my mind.<br />
<br />
The acronym of my current life stands for this: Jobless, Unemployed, Not working, Poor, & In Debt. Working and '&' screwed up the made up word so I left them out. It's my word, I can do what I want with it.<br />
<br />
Here's a brief look into the JUNPID saga so far:<br />
<br />
I got my degree in journalism and here's my list of careers I want to go into from most desirable to last:<br />
1. Sports Broadcast<br />
2. Sports Public Relations<br />
3. Television News<br />
4. Public Relations <br />
5. Sports Newspaper<br />
6. Regular Newspaper<br />
7. Sports Radio<br />
8. Radio<br />
<br />
Now that we're on the same page, I can inform you I've sent out more than 30 demo tapes of my on-camera and off-camera work to television stations. How many interviews you ask? Zip. Apparently one and half years experience doesn't matter.<br />
<br />
How many other applications have I sent out? I'm nearing the 40 range. Interviews? 3.<br />
First one was for a job in the great town of Dunlap, Il. A po-dunk town that consists of a really crappy high school athletic force and about three intersections to the town. This position was for a mix between numbers 5 and 6 listed above for $11.25 an hour. That rounded out to about 23k a year. <a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.chicagoist.com/attachments/chicagoist_chuck/2005_09_ronald-mcdonald-street-bum.jpg&imgrefurl=http://chicagoist.com/2005/09/22/mcdonalds_in_the_news.php&usg=__ofCrjry5zXOiTRCYHEEnCe9GWRI=&h=212&w=293&sz=21&hl=en&start=16&sig2=rvU6V41xRyfoweEXFd_IbA&tbnid=XKHdpuAjlcr17M:&tbnh=130&tbnw=164&ei=ZylkTJ3UF9KHnQeT2biODw&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbum%2Bon%2Bthe%2Bstreet%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26biw%3D1012%26bih%3D565%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C223&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=576&vpy=326&dur=1458&hovh=164&hovw=227&tx=91&ty=131&oei=eShkTPz2FIuRnAfQntmODw&esq=2&page=2&ndsp=17&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:16&biw=1012&bih=565">Welfare checks anyone?</a> Needless to say, I passed on the opportunity.<br />
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Interview number 2: Pattonville School District. 32k a year. I really wanted this one. I was videotaped on the interview which is one of the top 5 most awkward things ever. That list will eventually be released by month as well. Anyway, I made the most boneheaded mistake ever on my application and I'm pretty sure it cost me the position. I received a phone call a week later after the interview. I had marked yes under the question, "Have you committed a felony with in the past 'X' years?"<br />
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For the record, I haven't committed a felony. I apparently just can't read.<br />
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Interview number 3: I didn't go! This was for a news radio position in Iowa. They weren't even going to pay for my travel. Screw that.<br />
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So now that we're all caught up, next time we go into my JUNPID saga we can go into more detail.Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-88272857064225833982010-08-11T16:14:00.000-07:002010-08-12T18:24:06.779-07:00Old show for you to reference #1: Doug<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGMsTQ6EOEI/AAAAAAAAAAk/CfSD6T-OI54/s320/DougArtwork.jpg" />Doug and the gang here are quite the group have a conversation about.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>For intensive purposes, I'll set you up where this conversation always goes between friends, and where you can take it a step further and prove you had too much time on your hands as a kid.<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>Where the conversation always goes</i>:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Yeah, Doug always wore that green sweater vest and he wore his underwear over his khakis as quailman</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>Where you can one up them</b>:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">In one episode, everybody picked up the hot new magazine off the shelf that featured Doug's outfit, so everybody in school wore it. He hated it, dressed differently the next day for only everybody to now be wearing Skeeter's attire.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Where the conversation always goes:</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">He had a huge crush on Patti Mayonnaise. And Roger Klotz hated him.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>Where you can one up them</b>: </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Big deal. Doug's least favorite food was liver and onions.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>Where the conversation always goes:</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">His dog was named Pork Chop.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Where you can one up them:</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Judy was his sisters name.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">That is about as far as your friends can usually reach with Doug. Here are some other random facts in case you get into a heated referencing battle:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The Beets were the equivalent to the Beatles.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Doug had two hit songs: Banging on a Trash Can and Big!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">He lived in Bluffington. It was believed to be have founded by a pioneer in BeBe Bluff's family, but they found an old skeleton representing Mr. Dink's body (Doug's neighbor).</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">And to settle all scores everybody can agree on one thing:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Doug sucked when Disney took over.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-227815934070102811.post-27937335339321261192010-08-11T15:55:00.000-07:002010-08-12T18:24:46.355-07:00The legend of the Quy speciesThere is a animal who plays cards at a local casino here in St. Louis, Mo that most people will think when done reading this, cannot exist.<br />
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This historical figure is known as a Quy. For all purposes, pronounce it like <i>Qwee</i>!<br />
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Quy's are built like a 5'3 Asian man who has a language of all of his own. They literally mumble at the table in vernacular that no ordinary human being could understand.<br />
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They is closely related to this species from a long, long time ago from a galaxy far, far away.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGHKOjOrB8I/AAAAAAAAAAc/25ZrkELxPhU/s1600/ewok.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dMF1g4Bm5AQ/TGHKOjOrB8I/AAAAAAAAAAc/25ZrkELxPhU/s320/ewok.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">He's about their height and instead of equipping himself with a utility belt, Quy chooses the <a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://playabound.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/fannypacktourist.jpg&imgrefurl=http://playabound.wordpress.com/2009/04/12/vanity-vanity-all-is-vanity/&usg=__dTCLn59Sv9iU_ZpknEaetyQH0uw=&h=500&w=375&sz=125&hl=en&start=0&sig2=g2DjXnLREaipjGdPR0Dy5g&tbnid=07VHFMogjXbS9M:&tbnh=191&tbnw=136&ei=nMphTN_GFtnsnQfxr_CZDQ&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dfannie%2Bpacks%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26biw%3D1680%26bih%3D775%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=584&vpy=214&dur=1482&hovh=259&hovw=194&tx=103&ty=191&oei=nMphTN_GFtnsnQfxr_CZDQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=27&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:0">fashionable route</a>.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Since Quy is part of the ewok family, there is likely a Quy in your neighborhood. If you happen to capture a Quy, here are some helpful tips to housebreaking your very on Quy.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">-Quy's love having loose change in their fannie packs. It gives them something to count.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">-Don't be alarmed if your Quy waddles, they are bow-legged.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">-When taking your Quy for a walk, they love to shit on the sidewalk. Bring a bag.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">-Your Quy is going to be very frugal and try to pinch every last penny off of you. Rip off your Quy while he takes one of his multiple naps throughout the day.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I hope this post has helped you manage your very own Quy. Good luck, and do remember, Quy's can take down <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkWJpvNhADU">storm troopers</a>, so watch out.</div>Dru Tatehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05675120062887161178noreply@blogger.com0